I posted this on Facebook back in 2016, but with the deprecation of the Notes feature, the post got lost. So I’ll leave this here for posterity
Ten years ago, October 13th 2006, something unthinkable happened to me. I got kidnapped from my own garage, held hostage for over three hours under the aim of two guns, threatened of death, robbed and then finally, after much negotiation, released physically intact. Emotionally in pieces. This episode has marked my life so strongly, that I could never forget all the details and I still dream about it more frequently that I would like. It has changed me forever and it has also made me much stronger.
In all these years, I’ve never talked much about this openly. I don’t know why actually. Maybe because I don’t want people to feel sorry for me. Or maybe because I’m embarrassed this kind of thing has become pretty common in my country. There’s also so much shit going on in the world, so much stuff way worse than this. Anyway, I just decided that I wanted to write about this before my memory fades away.
One interesting thing that I learned after leaving Brazil is how people from different parts of the world react when I tell them I’ve been kidnapped. In Brazil, the reaction is always the same, something like “ohh man, you too, that’s so brutal, bla bla”. Pretty much everybody in large cities has someone close that has been through that. Almost all my friends from first world countries react immensely shocked, like “WHAT THE F*?”. A while ago, I told a friend from Pakistan about this, he felt sorry for me and told me something way more surreal that has happened to his family. Yes, everything is relative.
Before I tell how it happened, it’s important for you to understand the motivation, because that can vary a lot in different places around the world. In Brazil, it’s nothing about terrorism. The main motivation is to take your car, followed by quick things they can do while they have you, like withdrawing money from ATMs, buying stuff with your credit cards, etc. Statistically, in most of the cases people are released without injuries. Unfortunately, over the years this kind of crime has become more and more violent, with the number casualties rising every year.
I used to live in a very busy avenue in Porto Alegre, with lots of businesses around my apartment building. It was very busy in the evenings too, with pubs and restaurants around. That day was a Friday, around 9pm. I was coming from work later than usual. My building didn’t have electric garage doors, which was pretty annoying. I had to leave the car, unlock and open the door, put the car in, close and lock the door. That day, I put the car in the garage, turned it off and as soon as I opened the door, I noticed someone by the driver door. Before I could realize what was going on, another guy entered the car through the left rear door. I thought they wanted the car, so I gave them the key and told I didn’t care about the car and I had insurance, so no big deal. The guy by my door told me to move to the passenger seat, that he would drive. I tried to argue to leave the car, then he pointed a gun at me and repeated the order. I moved to the passenger seat. The guy took the driver seat, started the car and backed up aggressively from the garage. People yelled at us for the reckless driving and some of them soon realized what was going on. A security guard from a pub nearby had noticed people entering the garage and came running carrying a gun. I shook my head asking the guy not to shoot, because the guy behind me had a gun right at the back.
At this point, the criminals knew they had been noticed and the police had been called. They were very nervous arguing with each other about what to do next, while the car was going way faster than prudent in a busy street. I was quiet, still digesting what was going on. I was very concerned about my reactions, because I had no idea how I’d react under so much stress. Would I have a panic attack, or become very aggressive, or start screaming, or jump off the car, or whatever else? Fortunately, I was still thinking straight, and concentrated to stay as calm as possible. I focused on their motivations and convinced myself they didn’t want to hurt me. If I didn’t do anything stupid, I’d probably be fine.
The guy behind was much more stressed and paranoid. He was too concerned I was too calm. He started patting me looking for a gun and he asked me dozens of times if there was a gun in the car. I couldn’t possibly be that calm. I told them calmly I never had a gun and I wouldn’t do anything stupid. They know where I live and I didn’t want any retaliation. I said I was willing to give up the car and the insurance would just give me another one. They said they need money too and I said fine, let’s just go to an ATM somewhere and get it. No big deal.
They were too concerned about a police chase, so we drove to an adjacent city to the north. Getting there, they spent some time looking for an ATM where the car wouldn’t be too visible. The time was about 9:45pm. After 10pm, all ATMs in Brazil lock down and only allow BRL 100 (about USD 45 back then) to be withdrawn. Most of them also lock down several features, like statements and balances. I don’t need to explain why the banks do that, do I? I was very concerned they could want to see my balance, because I had probably over BRL 10,000 in my account, and that could be a good reason for them to keep me overnight. They hadn’t realized the 10pm lock down. To gain time, I suggested to go to another town 20 minutes away. That town was much more quiet, so it was less likely to have a police encounter. Magically, they agreed immediately and there we went.
Meanwhile, my phone rang and it was my roommate. He had been notified by the security guard of what happened. The guys asked me to answer in the loudspeaker and say that I was fine and I’d be back home soon. They got my phone and turned it off. They asked if there was anybody else waiting for me. I said no and that my whole family lived in a different town.
We got to the next town about 10:10pm, so I knew they couldn’t see my balance anymore. The driver got my card and the pin, but somehow he couldn’t get anything. I think he just got nervous. He decided to try another ATM, to avoid being at the same place too long. Next time, he asked me to go with him, and threatened to shoot me if I screamed or ran away. They were calm now, so the conversation was much more fluid. He asked me how much I had in the account and I lied with “maybe about 700, 800”. I tried to withdraw BRL 600 and the ATM showed a message stating the limit after 10pm. I showed him and he realized the time and asked to get 100 anyway, so I did it. We walked back to the car and started driving again. At this point, they really trusted I wouldn’t do anything stupid.
They started arguing what to do next. They wanted more money, but there was nothing they could do with the ATMs. They tried another ATM, to check if the limit was imposed by the ATM itself or by the bank. It was obviously by the bank. They suggested to use my credit card to buy some expensive liquor, so they could sell that later. They asked if I had BRL 1,000 in credit. I said I think so and we could try. We drove through some gas stations with large convenience stores, but they were all too busy, which is a common thing in Brazil in the weekends. People hang out in gas stations to drink and chat. They were afraid to be noticed, so we ended up not buying anything. Another hour passed with that.
Around that time, something that I always thought it was bullshit, happened to me: Stockholm syndrome. That’s when you start feeling empathy and sympathy toward your captors. I was genuinely treating them as they were my friends. We chatted about parties in town, music, women, etc. I was even laughing. And trust me, I was not acting at all. That has immensely helped me to negotiate my way out.
They realized they had me for over two hours and it was becoming more and more likely to be caught by police. They wanted the car, but they knew the car was flagged. During that discussion, they accidentally leaked their hometown, and to get there, they would have to drive in a main highway for an hour, which was too much exposure. They were also discussing what to do with me. They said I had been a very nice guy, so they wouldn’t hurt me bad. One guy wanted to “just” shoot me in the knee. I didn’t want to be shot in the knee, so I was trying to find a better place in the body to be shot at, to try to negotiate that. I knew that, anything under my waist would be probably be ok, if they didn’t release me in the middle of nowhere, where I could bleed to death. I told them it was really not necessary to shoot me. That wouldn’t buy them too much. I told I really didn’t want to hurt them. I just wanted to go home and put this behind us. I told them I agreed it was too risky to drive this car much longer, regardless of me in it or not. I vaguely suggested they could just get another car. They thought it was a brilliant idea, which depressed me, because it was so obvious. If they were smart, they would probably be doing something else with their lives, after all.
They loved my idea so much that they started planning that. With me! I really didn’t want to be part of a secondary kidnap. They suggested a club, where people are usually spending lots of time looking for parking. I suggested I could drop them there in a good spot and leave. They said they were afraid I’d get them in trouble right after. I explained again they knew where I live and I really wanted to just go home. I knew I was asking too much, but I needed to try. And guess what, they accepted the deal. We drove through a couple parties, discussed the possible victims, the risks, escape routes, etc. I was even enjoying my criminal skills at this point, and they were impressed with my insights, honestly all too obvious. We found a place that was perfect. It was dark and people were very distracted trying to park in tight spots. It was an upscale neighborhood, so all cars were pretty nice. Once they decided that was the place, the guy drove one more block, stopped the car as if we were going to the club. We talked a bit and they told me to wait for 5 minutes after they leave and drive home. I told them to take care, we shook hands and they left, taking my cell phone, a digital camera and BRL 100. They gave me back my wallet with all my documents and cards.
It was just over midnight when I was released. The place I got released was close to my office, so I drove straight there, parked the car, took the elevator and walked to my desk. When I sat there that the whole thing got off my shoulders. I cried a lot for several minutes. I called my roommate, who was desperate at home, and told him I was safe and released. I was too nervous to drive again, so I called a taxi home. When I arrived at home, my roommate was downstairs talking to some police officers. The security guard came quickly to see how I was and I thanked him for not starting a shooting. The police asked me why I had taken a taxi, suspecting I was hiding something. I showed them I had the car key and the car was safe in my office. They asked to show up at the police station to file the report. I did that a few days later.
In the first weeks after the episode, I was so scared that I couldn’t drive. I had the feeling that someone was always following me. I couldn’t go anywhere without looking around 360 degrees every couple seconds. Eventually, I stopped being scared and resumed my normal life, but it was never the same again. Since then, I’ve become much more alert with my surroundings. I stopped using the garage and started leaving the car in the street, where it was much faster for me to get in and out. A few months later, my roommate and I moved to a different place, staffed 24 hours, with automated garage doors, cameras, etc. I bought another car as well soon after moving. I felt much more secure, even though I really wasn’t much. Every month on average, I heard from a neighbor they had had the car taken in front of the building. None of them got kidnapped though. I developed strategies to minimize my chances. When I was getting in, I paid a lot of attention of everyone around, and in a lot of times, I just drove by. When I was getting out in the night, I never turned my lights on. I lived in that place until 2012, when I left Brazil, and nothing happened to me anymore.
Car theft is a huge business in Brazil. It used to be harmless in the past, but nowadays it’s virtually impossible to steal a car without its coded key, so the thing has become violent. The thieves make very good money selling stolen cars. Most cars get disassembled be to sold in parts, which is very profitable. A good chunk of stolen cars are sold in small towns with fake plates, or even in neighboring countries like Paraguay, where cars are much less regulated. Insuring a car against theft in large cities can cost up to 10% the car value every year. Some cars can cost even more. Most insurance companies are installing GPS trackers to have a better chance to get the car back. Porto Alegre has 1.4 million inhabitants. Only this year, 1 person has been murdered every week, on average, in car thefts. On average, over 30 cars are stolen every single day in the city.
I just can’t possibly think in raising children in a place like that. I was so fortunate to be alone when this happened to me. If I had someone else, the outcome could’ve been completely different. Last time we visited Porto Alegre, we took the kids just one day to the city, only during the day and only parking in the private garages. It takes a lot of time to get them in and out of the car seats. It’s the perfect opportunity for a thief.
That’s very sad, because Porto Alegre is a great city and it’s always a pleasure to visit. Also, this isn’t any different in any other large city in Brazil. It depresses me, whenever I visit, to see people being paranoid all the time about their surrounds. Everybody knows their time is coming.
The US isn’t notorious for being a very safe place, but it’s just not comparable. In 4 years living in the Bay Area, the worst thing I’ve heard was a friend losing an iPhone at gunpoint. Car break-ins are quite common in larger places like San Francisco. House burglaries are relatively common. But I believe those are all crimes committed by individuals, not organized crime with an industry behind. Gang-related crime is very common everywhere in the world.
Events like that change you. I believe that in most times for the better. I realized that you can lose everything out of a sudden. You’re healthy one day and the next day you can be dead or in a wheel chair, because someone decided the pull the trigger on you. I stopped caring about things. Want to take my car? Whatever, I’ll get another one. As long as my family and I are safe, we can always rebuild.
Be safe!